Suicide of Justin Fashanu

Well, if anyone finds this note hopefully I won’t be around to see it. But let’s begin at the beginning. What a start, everything going so well then I felt I was abandoned, left alone, without anybody to turn to. Being gay and a personality is so hard but everybody has it hard at the moment so I can’t complain about that. I want to say I didn’t sexually assault the young boy. He willingly had sex with me and then the next day asked for money. When I said no he said ‘you wait and see’. If that is the case, I hear you say, why did I run? Well justice isn’t always fair. I felt I wouldn’t get a fair trial because of my homosexuality. Silly thing really but you know what happens when you panic. I want to die rather than put my friends and family through any more unhappiness! I wish I was more of a good son, brother, uncle and friend. But I tried my best. This seems to be a really hard world. I hope the Jesus I love welcomes me home. I will at last find peace.

Justin Fashanu hanged himself in a London garage, May 1998, on the run accused of sexual assault.

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